How I Came To Know Jesus

Google Image

Growing from a Catholic background, I found myself attending church out of obligation or duty when I was little. It did not spring from a heart that is after God's heart. I grew tired and hated it because I found it became just a routine. Back then, I had very limited knowledge on what God expects of us, what is His character, what is Heaven or Hell (is it even real or just a myth)? I always compared myself to others, saying to myself that I'm better because I do not kill, steal, or violate others. I also had many questions regarding life and was particularly interested in sciences, astronomy (blackholes in particular), aliens, evolution, etc. In fact, I spent most of my time watching YouTube videos and researching in the internet regarding these topics during my college years. I never read the Bible unless it is needed for educational purposes (i.e. in school) because when I tried reading it, I cannot understand what was written in it. It is full of "mysteries" and I just did not want to take the effort in discerning the message inside it, because honestly what does it even have to do with me? It seemed better to run deep into science, the little things which it can explain with so much detail. It was what I found wonderful during that time.

How about God? Do I really need God when I'm living comfortably? For one thing I know -- that God created us and the world, He is merciful and that as long as I do not commit any "mortal sins" and I do good to my neighbor, I would "hopefully" go to Heaven (supposing it's real) and that's it - the end. I believed that we all worshiped the same God, that Allah which the Muslims worshiped and our God is just the same. I also believed then that it is just fine to do the things which are of popular opinion and that we should be accepting the standards of the modern world. Spiritual matters just did not matter to me at all and I ignored it.

However, all of those were my misconceptions and I did not really know who God is until now. Much to my realization, science only answered the questions of how but it did not really answer the questions of who and why. I was foolish to dismiss the Bible and discard it, doubting its credibility when I have not even tried reading its content wholeheartedly. I'm just thankful to God for opening my eyes. Here is my story of how I came to know the Lord.

My Story - The Starting Point To Knowing God May 2016

It was May 2016, I looked back on my life and reflected. "Where is this life taking me?", I needed directions. I was about to hit my second year of working as IT Consultant in HPE (now DXC) and it appears I did not have any life goals yet! That was the day when I started to go to the bookstore to find a book that would give me the answers, if not, at least guide me somehow. I wanted to change my life, to think and prepare for my future, and to take action right then!

At the best-selling shelf, this book "7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change" by Stephen Covey captured my attention. As I inspected it, it says "25th Anniversary Edition" and "Over 25 Million Copies Sold". I said to myself, "This is it!" and without any hesitation grabbed it and proceeded to the cashier to buy it.

This book is just wonderful! When I started reading it, I cannot put it down. It is full of those moments where you reflect on your life and see how it could immensely change your life if the principles taught are applied. This book is not one of those that you just read and then done, it needs to be read over and over through the years and apply the principles taught. Believe it or not, I was never a fan of reading books until I read this one!

At the end of the book, Covey discussed about the last habit: "Habit 7: Sharpen The Saw". Habit 7 is focused around renewal, or taking time to “sharpen the saw.” It surrounds all of the other habits and makes each one possible by preserving and enhancing your greatest asset -- yourself. This habit mentions four dimensions of our nature that we continuously need to exercise and improve to bring the best out of ourselves. These four dimensions are: physical dimension, mental dimension, spiritual dimension, and social/emotional dimension. I reflected on my life and realized how I was deeply lacking in the spiritual dimension.

June 2016

It was a normal working day and I was at the office working at night shift. As I was scrolling through my facebook news feed, I saw a post from my office-mate and it seems our team has a new hire. She spent her first day celebrating her birthday at the office!

As I carefully observed her life, I noticed she has a strong faith, she enjoys church, she is family oriented, she is diligent, and she is simple. On top of that, I saw how she turned down alcohol so as not to compromise her faith. I wanted to know what was the reason behind all of it, her good character. I found out she is a Christian and that what she looks for a man is God-fearing.

I reflected again and asked myself, "What does it mean to be God-fearing or having a fear of God?" I kept on hearing this term ever since I was a child, even from my mom who always had a strong faith in God. Previously, I have mentioned that I was lacking in the spiritual dimension as I reflected after reading the 7 Habits book. With all of these combined, it sparked my interest in Christianity and so my journey to seek God started.

Based on Merriam-Webster dictionary, God-fearing is defined as -- "used to describe religious people who try to obey the rules of their religion and to live in a way that is considered morally right." Now, that does not seem right because if someone is just trying to obey the rules and follow tradition then it is not enjoyable at all. However, as I mentioned before, I saw from our new hire that she enjoys going to church and her joy radiates not just on the outside but also from inside her. Her life made me reflect mine, some questions that I asked myself:

"How come she enjoys her faith?"

"Where is my faith?"

"Why do I only seek God when I need something from Him?"

"Why do I treat God as my last resort?"

"Where have I been all this time?"

August 2016

I approached one of my close friends -- thesis-mate from DLSU. In our chat over messenger, I first brought up the 7 Habits book - how it has the power to change lives when the principles were applied. Then, I just remembered that he is a born again Christian so I went ahead to ask for a good church to attend to. He said he was attending Victory and told me Christian churches are usually open to everyone. He was encouraging me to go ahead and just try, listen to the preaching and observe. As a word of advice, he warned me regarding prosperity preachers and false doctrines because that's where he came from before coming to Victory. Moreover, he emphasized the importance of sound doctrine -- to be watchful of those who tamper with God's Word and those who use it to their own interests. Since it was my first time -- add to it further that I am an introvert, I was afraid to go alone. So I asked him if he could accompany me. He told me that he was previously attending at Victory Malate but now he transferred to Victory Novaliches and is part of music (praise and worship) team there so it would be quite difficult. For me, I lived around Muntinlupa so we were far off and we could only meet halfway.

One week lapses -- August 13 -- I received a message from my thesis-mate, he told me he was going to attend Victory Malate on August 28, 11 AM. In the following days (the same week of August 13), our manager had set an offsite on August 27-28 so I was to choose whether I would go to the offsite or go to church with my friend. After much thought, I told my thesis-mate I would not be able to go due to our offsite (I realize now how sad he felt when I told him that). But then, a week before the 28th, the offsite got canceled and did not push through. So I immediately messaged him that we could go ahead on August 28! During that time, it came running to my thoughts what excuse would I give my mom. I also just remembered that she mentioned to me last August 21 during our family outing at Villa Escudero not to convert to born again Christian when we went through some wedding area there on our tour. Little did she know I was already planning to go and try attending at Victory. I just came up with the excuse that me and my thesis-mates will be having a reunion over at DLSU (I now feel sorry for lying over it).

On August 28, me and my thesis-mate together with his fiance met at McDonald's beside DLSU. We walked to Victory Malate, chatting and catching up with each other as we were on the way. Arriving at Victory Malate, lines were starting to form as people wait for the 11 AM worship service. Finally, doors were opened and we started walking in. We were seated at the middle and had a good view of the stage. It started with praise & worship -- my first impression for it was good and engaging. Preaching of the Word followed, and my impression for it -- it was great because I understood the message well through the pastor's exegesis. After the worship service, my thesis-mate and I went to KFC to meet with his small bible study group called "Victory Group" to introduce me to them while his fiance went to J.Co Donuts to wait for us to finish. I was surprised to see how welcoming and good they were, each one shared their insights and experiences as we discussed the Word. It was refreshing, I met new people (new friends) who were open and hospitable. Interestingly, we were all diverse (there's a student and there were young professionals of different professions) at ages 20-30, yet we were united because of the Word. "So this is fellowship", I said to myself. At the end of the day, I decided to go ahead and attend the following Sunday at Victory Alabang and get connected there. It is just 20 minutes away from home and more convenient. During the night, my curiosity just won't stop. I found this app "Got Questions?" which have been a big help to answering most of my questions.

September 2016

The following week -- September 4, 2016 -- I was to attend my first attendance at Victory Alabang's worship service. Before I went, I told my mom the truth that I would be attending a Christian church. I was surprised she allowed me. She just said it was up to me and it's my decision. So I went ahead and attended the worship service at Victory Alabang alone. I immediately went to the concierge after the service and registered to be connected for Victory Group and One 2 One (discipleship guide). My hunger to know God just kept on growing. For the following days, I started looking for Christian music and I really enjoyed listening to them. On September 10, 2016, it was a Saturday night and I was worried because no one is contacting me yet when I've been so excited to meet my Victory Group and to start my discipleship journey already.

On Sunday, September 11, 2016, it was my third worship service at Victory (second at Victory Alabang). At that moment, towards the end of the session, I was unknowingly in tears and felt myself repentant of my sins. It was my first encounter with God, Jesus knocked at the door of my heart and I let him in. It was the moment I surrendered myself to Jesus and accepted Him as my personal Lord and Savior. I do not remember what the pastor said but the message is "How we love others is a reflection of Christ's love in us". What I know is that God called me during that time, and I responded with "Yes, Lord!". So this is what the Scripture labels as born again or spiritual rebirth. Towards the end of the day, I also got a text message from a Victory Group leader that we would meet up on the following week so I could start my discipleship journey.

Weeks passed and I finished my One 2 One journey and also started to be actively involved in Victory Group. Being actively involved in small group paired with Bible meditation has helped me build up my faith, my spiritual foundation and ultimately my love for God. Thanks to my Victory group leader who discipled me, sacrificing time and resources just to make sure that I am on the right track. However, God is not yet done with me, He has given me challenges and problems to show me I cannot do it alone and that I needed to rely more on Him.

God's Extreme Generosity And Divine Providence October 2016 My mom is currently battling stage 4 breast cancer which recurred last July 2015. But God proved to us that He is bigger. She actually had overcome stage 2 breast cancer already and completely recovered last 2006 which during that time I was still young and still in my second year of high school. This time, God showed us that He is still in control. We had financial problems for her medication because she now needs to take hormones that costs P3000 per tablet which is to be taken once a day with no definite time when it would stop. That is in addition to her current medication (chemotherapy & oral medicine which are too many to mention) which my brother always provided for generously since July 2015. We are indeed blessed that he now works in Singapore. Even that was God's plan, not just so that he could provide for us but to be a channel of blessing to others as well. My mom did not want to ask more from my brother since he has always provided and he also needs to save up for his future. Now imagine where would we be able to get that huge sum of money to afford the hormonal therapy, it seemed impossible. I started to think about how I could contribute which led me to approach one of my high school friends who is now a successful entrepreneur for a certain MLM (multi-level marketing) company which sells health products. It was a week before my retreat in Victory Alabang called "Wildfire" which was scheduled to be on October 29-31, 2016. My peace of mind was greatly disturbed and I really thought of entering MLM business. However, upon asking advice from a fellow believer and brother in the office, he told me to seek God first. Thinking of his advice, I looked back on myself and saw that I'm only a new believer or a "baby Christian" so it did seem right. Besides, I am also aware that entering MLM business would require resources (time, money and commitment). I did further research on the internet for more advice. A day before my retreat, it was then that a Bible verse from Matthew answered me with full conviction, "But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble". After receiving that message from God, I asked my high school friend if she could give me more time to decide. During the "Wildfire" retreat, one of the messages from the pastor was to protect your time with God, it seemed God was already shouting at me because I'm still thinking of entering the MLM business. I finally decided not to enter MLM and to fully commit myself to being a disciple of Christ. Weeks after the retreat, God being ever gracious provided all that we needed. PCSO has approved financial aid for my mom's medication amounting to P100k per month until January 2017 in addition to the HMO I receive from my employment which has been helpful for my mom's CT Scan expenses. My mom also met a Christian in PCSO who is also a cancer patient. They both take the same hormone medicine but its side effects on the other patient is not tolerable. That patient still had 21 tablets left, so she offered it to my mom on a discounted price -- only P1000 per tablet from the original price of P3000. What's more, that patient also shared the gospel to my mom. On top of that, my mom's siblings also provided financial help. I can't stop praising God whenever I remember this. Definitely, God is able. I realized from this event that God was after my heart and not after my "works". On deciding if I should enter MLM business, my heart then was mixed with my wants rather than what is God's will for me -- I was devising a strategy (or "diskarte" in Filipino) and I was relying on myself instead of relying solely on Him.

My New Life in Christ - Starting A Relationship With A Personal God

On November 18th and 19th, I was baptized and it was the best feeling I had. Nothing in this world -- riches, wealth, power, influence, fame, knowledge, relationships, pleasures -- can compare to the saving knowledge of Christ. My life has never been the same. It was the best thing that happened in my life and also the best decision I made.

I came to know that God only expects us to repent and believe in Him (in the finished work of Christ at the cross) and that He wants us to have a personal relationship with Him. No amount of good works can save us and there is no sin too great which He cannot forgive. God is not just limited to the spirit, but because He is God, He is much more than that - He is God over everything and there is no limit/boundaries to His power. He is loving and just. He is surely alive! He has given me a new life and calls me to set things right with my new heart. When I started to have a personal relationship with Him, He has not just forgiven me and cleansed me from all my sins but He also released me from shame and guilt that I have always carried. Transformation and renewal followed, bad habits started to die off one after another, because of my personal relationship with Him and not because I am just trying to follow rules or God's commandments. It is not instantaneous but a lifelong process and is only possible because of God's divine grace working in me through His Holy Spirit. So this is what it means to be free, free from the bondage of sin and freedom to honor God, when they say "the truth will set you free". I have also developed the passion to read and study the word of God, that every time I read it, God really speaks to me. Even if I go over the same verse at different times, I am amazed at how it brings a different message to me.

God's Divine Healing - A Miracle In The Midst Of Storms On April 4, 2017, another miracle happened -- a miracle of healing -- where a malignant tumor of 2.5 cm in size has disappeared according to the results of my mom's CT Scan. Tests also showed that everything is stable. Even my mom's oncologist was surprised by the results. Whether it's due to the hormones being taken or not, we believe it is the work of God. Jesus is indeed the miracle worker, the ultimate healer and the ultimate provider. He is the ultimate source of everything. Despite my mom's condition, I can definitely see peace in her -- the peace of God which transcends all understanding -- because of her strong faith in God.

God's Divine Sovereignty - If It Is God's Will, It Will Be Done

Looking back at everything that happened in my life, I found that God is truly behind everything. He used the 7 Habits book, our new hire, my thesis-mate, my Victory Group leader, Victory Alabang and many others as instruments to lead me to Him. It also dawned on me that what draws me to our new hire is that I saw Jesus in her. God has revealed to me -- the reason why I'm at DXC is to experience all of these. If you are familiar with the #chickensad incident of Jollibee way back August 2014, it had an impact with my employment status during that time. I was about to have this job offer already from the IT company behind Jollibee when the issue happened. After that incident, the company did not call us applicants again. Some weeks passed and I finally received a call from HP (it was not yet HPE/DXC during that time) to finally have an interview then a job offer. It was also an answered prayer because I have been waiting for their call for 5 months already. Undoubtedly, everything happens for a reason (which includes unfortunate events - He only allows it) - for a greater purpose that is according to God's will. God is sovereign and I am a witness to this saying, "Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything."

God has been faithful to me despite my unfaithfulness. Like the popular Parable of the Prodigal Son, I was the one who went away and lavished my life over worthless things. He provided everything, yet there I was living for myself. I realized how proud, selfish and self-righteous I am, thinking I deserve better when compared to others. He reached out His hand to me and I was reconciled with Him. Now I strive to live only with the purpose of advancing His Kingdom and to bring glory to His name.

Victorious Life - Living In Christ, Through Christ And For Christ As I go along this journey, I just realize more and more that I cannot do it by myself and desperately needed God's help. Only He can bring me to my best self when I know my identity in Him; not my identity as defined by others nor myself. After reading self-help books, I realized that it may improve the life of a person but only to a certain extent because it relies on "self". It does not tackle the very roots of the problem which is the human heart. Based on my experience, I did not have the fuel to sustain myself even with the self-help books. I came to know that my sinful nature is what hindered me. God is undeniably the only one who can transform and renew our hearts.

Being a Christian does not mean living a sinless or perfect life because only Jesus is capable of such, it also does not mean a happy life. However, living the Christian life is full of struggles because it means killing your old ways, your old self. Yet, behind those struggles, pain and suffering is joy, peace and hope which can only be found in Christ and His promises. I was a skeptic before and questioned the resurrection of Jesus Christ. This link has helped me answer my question. Christianity is unlike any other religious groups which require you to follow and conform to certain rules. It is all about your personal relationship with God through Jesus Christ. I have decided to follow Jesus, even if it means to leave everything behind, because in Him is everything. I am nothing apart from Him.

Let me share what C.S. Lewis said in Mere Christianity:

Give up yourself, and you will find your real self. Lose your life and you will save it. . . . Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in.

This is my story, and it is just one of the many testimonies of lives changed by the gospel. God is alive and to Him be the glory forever. Make Jesus the center of your life, then everything will fall into place. He is everything that you need. If you are also interested in knowing Him, you may contact me and I would be more than glad to help and assist you. God bless!

#testimony